Stupid Words From Big People

You may ask yourself how can celebs and famous people be so stupid when they say things. Do celebs fake being so dumb. Judge for yourself ... read on !


Question: If you could live forever, would you and why? Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever." - Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest.

"Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff." - Mariah Carey

"Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of your life." - Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a federal anti-smoking campaign.

"I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body." - Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward.

"Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country." - Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC.

"We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees." - Jason Kidd, upon his drafting to the Dallas Mavericks.

"That scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a jackass, and I'm just the one to do it." - A congressional candidate in Texas.

"Half this game is ninety per cent mental." - Danny Ozark, Philadelphia Phillies manager

"It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it." - Al Gore, former Vice President

"I love California. I practically grew up in Phoenix." - Dan Quayle, former Vice President

"Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the same reactions in the brain as marijuana. The researches also discovered other similarities between the two, but can't remember what they are."-

"I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers. We are the president."-

"China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese."- Charles De Gaulle, former French President

SCREW MAWI !

Every morning I open the newspaper there’s one thing i hate to look at - Mawi ads. Mawi, a youngster turned AF winner, is now taking over the country if you’re not aware of that. The country gave him wealth and fame just because of a little competition. I mean, he sounds stupid, looks stupid and is goddamn rich. That doesn’t make sense la macha. How can a Malaysian Idol reject become a star because of a stupid tv show who sucks money out of teenagers(and some mak ciks in some cases) be even more famous than Jacklyn Victor?
That’s only one thing. The government is now going koo-koo. I don’t understand why the hell they’re giving Mawi the KL Tower. The only thing we Malaysians can show other people is now Mawiland. WTF!!! It’s like giving William Hung theWTC. At least he studies in a university. And I was happy that Malaysia did a breakthrough by producing our very own handphone, just to see another Mawi on it! Goddamnit, Mawi must’ve poisoned the government. NOBODY DIGS HIM!
Seriously not understanding why the hell is the government doing all this crap. And while rising our petrol price too. Even if they wanna give the KL Tower out, I think it should be Jac’s. But that’s unnesceary anyways. Final say, get Mawi out of our lives. And oh, try to kill him if you have the chance.

Things To Remember During A War

1. The only things more accurate than enemy fire is friendly fire.
2. Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo.
3. Teamwork is essential. It gives them more targets to shoot at.
4. No inspection-ready unit ever passed combat.
5. No combat-ready unit ever passed inspection.
6. Remember: your aircraft was made by the lowest bidder.
7. Never draw fire, it will irritate the rest of your formation.
8. Never share a cockpit with someone braver than you.
9. You are not Tom Cruise.
10. SAMs and AAA have the right-of-way.
11. If you aren’t sure, the SAMs are pointed at you.
12. If hit, landing near the people that just shot you down is not a good idea.
13. Close only counts in horseshoes, nukes and proximity-fused missiles.
14. Smart bombs have bad days too.
15. The best defense is to stay out of range.
16. If you are short on everything but enemy, you are in combat.

Another thing about Malaysians - Dinner/Parties

One thing about Malaysians that AH MO LANGS ( or preferably foreign people ) doesn’t really understand is the way Malaysians have dinners or parties. Actually these occasions can be verified in threee absolutely different types. First, there is the chinese way. The Malay & Indian way comes next and finally the banana-men type.
The Chinese way normally consists drunk people yelling " YAM SENG " all night long, sexy or old baggy females who pours alcoholic drinks to make them drunk, and also the very important … Karaoke. The chinese way will only be seen in chinses weddings, anniversaries, and yeah, the chinese festivals. This special type of pattern wouldn’t be perfect if there is nobody who’s seriously late. An ear-blasting karaoke is also very important in this kind of dinners. People usually hire those who can’t sing or those who are very annoying to be MCs of their dinners. This is supposed to ruin one’s dinner so that those who doesn’t drink can go home and watch porn movie earlier while the others stay in the dinner and start their riot. " YAM SENG " is their one and only quote although some put in " Diu Nei " , " Ne Wai Sa " or some even " Ma Chau Hai ". In conclusion, this is what some call the " Chou Gau Sai " ( goddamn noisy) style.
While the chinese way is all about noise pollution, the Malay & Inidian way, M&I for short form is theme in a “REBUT” style. The people attendingthis kind of dinner will fight for food. The authorities normally cook little food and call trice the amount of people just to see them fight for food. These kind of dinner wouldn’t be as interesting as the chinese type, but still it is special in its own way. Instead of hearing curses all over the place, M&I dinners should be quiet as everybody will be too busy fighting for food and eating while some leaves the dinner to just chat with girls who will neer be interested in them.
Alas but not least, the banana-men way. This kind of party takes us away from locals and far away to the so called- cultured people race. The banana-men way of parties have it’s similarities with the chinese way though, as it also creates an unbelievable amount of noise pollution. It also includes alcoholic drinks and drunks talking english. These kind of party only happens in the Christmas - New Year time of the year. People will gather around and have a barbecue party on that day to get drunk enough to drive home and cause more accidents on the road for New Year’s. This kind of unique style of party must consist alcoholic drinks and alcoholics.
If you’re wondering why Malaysians are always so lively, this is one of the best reasons. I know - because the blogger is one. Alas, we shall be proud of our country and the people who lives in it and show salutations by yelling "MALAYSIA KALAH INDONESIA 2-0!"

Malaysian Creativity - Malaysia Boleh!

I once heard people say that Malaysia won’t produce much creative genuises . But I can prove them absolutely wrong. There are tons of creative bastards out here scattered throughout the country. Malaysians nowadays are no more followers of other bigger countries. They have their own creative ideas, either they’re from the big cities or the small kampungs.
One of the most obvious prove is their style on road. Malaysians tend to break the laws more than anywhere else in the world. Of course, breaking the laws is no fun if you only use one or two styles to harm other people on the road. We Malaysians use at least 10 styles to break rules on 1 road trip. Some cut through the line like no one’s business, while some reverse using the whole road on the touch-n-go lane just because their wives switched their touch-n-go cards to night club member cards. They are also others tryin to rip the lorry’s rear end apart from the car just to extend the length of their lorry and some who drives straight into police officers on the road just to scare them.
Another fact that shows Malaysians have great creativity is about self-creating musics. Many bands have been formed to show the creativity of Malaysians through their songs. One song - Trouble with KC by Ben’s Bitches is a truly creative 1 as the song only consists six words, Pukim*k , Lanji*u, Caujib**, Diu N* Ah Seng, Ma Cau H*i, and Pund*k. Truly a magnificent song that shows people that you don’t need to have long lyrics to make a nice song. Just six simple words.
One last and generally used creativity throughout the country is the art of foul words. One can admire the superb ability for Malaysians to scold one with their self-generated foul word as in other countries there are limited form of foul words. These foul words, mostly sounding harsh and evil, will bring liveliness into peoples hearts everyday.
For last sayings, Malaysians are actually one of the best races in the world if it’s about creativity. I know-because this blogger is a Malaysian. Alas, Malaysia shall rule as we rise up and scream at the top of our lungs: " Ma Chau …" … erm… I mean " MALAYSIA BOLEH!! "